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Thursday, December 10, 2009

Too much baggage for butterflies....

Once upon a time (3 years ago), I was a naïve and innocent woman, gullible, willing to believe the best about everybody...

Then came the liar...

Never even considered the notion that he might be untruthful... Until the 4AM call from his long-term PREGNANT girlfriend...

Less naïve, but still innocent, awaiting perfection to find me... Oh that was just one guy, no need for baggage

Then came another liar...

Questioned him to death, ARE YOU SURE YOU'RE SINGLE?? Okay, I believed... Until he stopped communicating. An emotional cheater, rather than a physical one...

Even less naïve, still innocent, awaiting perfection to find me... Now I've encountered 2 liars... Isolated cases! There's still hope!

Then came a truth-teller!

Why are you still single, I asked. Spirit of God moved him to say "Actually I'm not..."
WHAT?! Wow...

Naivete shattered, still innocent. Awaiting perfection to find me, but perfection doesn't exist among earthly men...

In the now...
where's the oooey gooey, crushy feelings? Where are the butterflies?

Do I have too much baggage for butterflies? Have they taken off with my naivete or are they simply trapped in the suitcases I'm carrying?

I don't know yet but my eyes are open and my walls are up. I'm not bitter... Yet...

*Sigh* I miss being naïve....
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